TOW#512 — Sorry!
Some people find it difficult to say the word SORRY when dealing with their mistakes. They know that it could help their careers, but something deep inside just doesn’t allow them to apologise!
On the other hand, there’re people who are quite the opposite, who don’t find it hard to say SORRY, and sometimes even say it when it’s not necessary, which results in the word losing much of its meaning due to overuse.
Yes, both examples are extreme, but what I’ve noticed is that honesty is key when apologising. Honesty to admit that you did indeed make a mistake, honesty to take responsibility as team leader, honesty in the pronunciation itself. I’m telling you this from my own experience, because, as a result of the aforementioned, I always say SORRY when it truly needs to be said. Or, as Seth Godin says
‘I’m sorry’ takes guts.
Saying SORRY, especially at work, is a delicate matter for various reasons, especially because the mistake you made can have major repercussions. On the other hand, not apologising can make things worse, so I’d like to share with you a few steps on how to say SORRY:
- Honesty — don’t apologise if you don’t mean it! That’s disrespectful. Now, if you’re truly being honest and the other side doesn’t believe you, that’s their problem!
- Empathy — try to put yourself in the skin of the person or people who were affected by your mistake. How would you feel if you were in their place?
- Responsibility — honest acceptance of responsibility by understanding the stupid thing you did and that you did it! This is the hardest part, mainly because it concerns the ego, but also because we all grow up thinking we’re faultless!?!?
- No excuses — you can’t blame someone else for something that’s your fault, for example by saying sorry and then adding ‘but you know it was mainly his/her fault…’
- Uncomfortable situation — you’ve made a mistake and there are big consequences… you think I don’t know that there’s no more uncomfortable situation that the one you find yourself in now? However, no matter how awkward or painful the situation, build up the courage and apologise! Don’t let the situation worsen when you know how it can be resolved.
- Have a suggestion — before apologising, think of a few proposals on how the problem can be overcome and how it can be avoided in the future! Nevertheless, if you make a promise, be sure to stick to it and not just forget about it after a while. ☺
- Learn from your mistakes — it’s a cliche, but it’s the final step in the process! If you don’t learn anything and you don’t change, then you’ll become one of those people who only apologises and nobody believes anymore that they’re truly sorry about anything!
And always remember, apologising is not supposed to be an enjoyable experience. Honest apologies are for the person to whom you’re saying sorry, so always put them in first place.
Wishing you success with the changes to come,
@kalinbabusku
“Tip of the Week” Team member
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